My Adult Yarn

Last night I dreamt of my ex boyfriend Miguel. I was dating him a few years back when I wentthroughmy crazy irresponsible stage. We met at a family function and were together for about 5 years total on and off. He was only 21 while I was already 28, and everyone thought I was crazy to be dating such a young guy. Like I said though at that time I had recently divorced and since my girls had gone to live with their dad I was lonely and he was nice and he treated me like a queen. After 5 years we broke up and this time it was for real, I moved on a few months later I found out that he had gone back to live in Mexico with no plans to ever return.

Since then I think of him a lot, it's now been 4 years since we last saw each other and I still can't forget him. I remember our first date and the way he loved to cuddle with me, no matter who was around watching, he truly loved me and I can'tbelievethat I was so stupid as to have lost him. Sometimes when you are dating someone you are so wrapped up in other things that you don't realize how much the person you are with does for you and how important they are. It's later that you realize that was probably the best person you have ever met and by that time it's too late. Even now I am in anotherrelationshipbut I know that the guy I am dating now in no way compares to him.

I wish I had been smart enough to have seen it then though, now there is nothing I can do and my heart aches just to think that I will never get to see him again. I wish I could go back and at least tell him that though I never really told him, I loved him. I was so selfish and cruel and I guess I reallydidn'tdeserve him. Hopefully he found someone who deserved him and will treat him better than I did. Hopefully he found a woman that could help him heal all those scars that I inflicted in his heart and make it whole again. Where ever he is at I hope that he is happy and I pray that he has found true love.